Tag Archives: random thoughts

The Look of It

Life’s a bit unfair, lately…

Or so do I thought.

It is a bit too much of everything.

The crossroads are through,

But not really though.

A little by a little, you started to lose yourself.

Devoured by the rhythm of mistakes,

You never knew would be so cruel.

You lost chances, and your loved ones hurt more.

Life’s a bit pristine, recently…

Or so do some thought.

How should we cope with the guilt of losing the things we lost,

That we don’t own?

As life’s a bit dragging,

You never knew it would be so cruel.

It throws you into regrets,

You blame yourself.

Until you can’t anymore.

But nothing you can feel more or less,

Life’s making you to love yourself less. And less it becomes…

As life’s a bit funny,

The love you get was so much,

Until you realized it,

It has changed a bit much.

Or that’s just the look of it?

 

 

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The Power Of Being Alone

Most of the days I wish you’re there for me are over.
Turned out, I handled them by myself. And I am proud of myself for that.

Why I ever thought I couldn’t go on without you anyway? Should I know I am this strong, I wouldn’t begged a candy from a stranger.

Can’t believe I even once sent myself to a conventry. Pretend like I’m a tumbleweed stuck in a rut, rolling lost, hollow, and done, in an empty desert.

I laughed at how silly I was. I am actually capable of being happy by my own. That’s ultimate. Most people feel strong when they’re coupled. I’d say, I’m stronger in my own way. With or without a lover. My internal are stronger than the external.

I am not single, I am in a relationship with myself.

I am focused. I put myself first, I make myself happy, I protect myself from being hurt, I love myself. And if someone tells me that I am wrong to feel that way or to live my life that way. I wonder what I or other people in my position should be feeling?

Lonely? Put ourselves last before people so we can be loved? Be sad so people will pity us? Be distracted by everyone who’s offering love? Be fragile and wait for someone to mend our wounds? Hate ourselves? No, big no-no!

I will be happy, it’s not mainstream. Most people won’t understand. But I won’t rush, if I meet someone who’s right, I will try. If it doesn’t work, it’s no one’s fault. It’s just wasn’t meant to be. Of course.

Whichever way, I can still be happy.

Yeah. Most of the days I wish you’re there for me are over.
Turned out, I’ve found the power of being alone.
And I am happy. And that’s ultimate.

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Do Coincidences Happen Coincidentally?

First of all, the thing that made me write this post is because of George.

Well, to be precise, I was watching Grey’s Anatomy (anyway, there’s going to be a little spoiler here); it was on season 6 episode 1 where they found out that the person with the severe damage was actually George.

Here’s where it gets funny, randomly I paused the movie for awhile to check on an E-Newspaper (Jakarta Globe) and saw an advertisement about Asus Nexus 7 which I found interesting. I clicked on it to get the details. There, I found a link to a video; I clicked on it and the first line in that advertisement was, “this is George.”

and I was like – – – – –┬áSeriously? George?

I know that is not something significant. It’s not like I have some kind of 6th sense or so. But, I am just really wondering if, by any chance, coincidences don’t coincidentally happen at times. I mean, it’s not seldom that I found myself wake up at the same time in the middle of my sleep (some kind of biological clock or what?), or when I have an acne on the left side of my face; another acne will appear on the right side of my face, at the same lining position to the first one.

Why are those coincidences somehow don’t seem coincidental at all.

As if they are a sign of something, a preminition of whatever it is.

While these events keep happening, I then started to take a note of every not-so-coincidentally coincidence that occurs. As many as I can recall, I think these coincidences are, well, suspicious, or just plain silly.

First,
I was born on the date 16,
I was ranked 16 twice while I’m in school, and oh…
I was the second son in my family. So, it’s like 16, 2×16, and 2 …
or I’m just making those numbers in my mind?

Second,
when I am thinking about a song in my head,
somehow, another person near to me will sing it or play it.
Maybe, I have some kind of telepathy talent or whatever. Coincidence?

Third,
when I don’t want to see a person,
I keep meeting them, or seeing them.
It’s actually pretty annoying.
I have a reason why I don’t want another encounter with them.
But I think God is telling me not to run from my problem, but face it?

Fourth,
when I want to answer a question from my teacher or lecturer,
I will say “me, me, me” in my head repeatedly and I will be picked to answer.
When I don’t want to answer, I still get picked.
Well, so I guess this is getting more and more pointless.

Okay okay, for the last one I was only joking. But seriously, I swear some coincidences are so not coincidental. I mean, look at George.

That must be a sign for something, right? George!
G.E.O.R.G.E ,
it’s a six letter word! Six!

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Syllogism’s Parody

Beauty is pain.
No pain no gain.
No beauty no gain…?

 

Love is sane.
thus, in-sane can be spelled in-love?

 

Truth hurts.
No one want s to get hurt.
No one wants the truth?

 

People say that love is everything.
But no one can do everything by himself.
So, love is meant to be done together?

 

Change is inevitable,
Bad habits must be changed,
Bad habits must be inevitable?

 

Time flies.
Bird flies.
Time is bird?

 

Singers sing.
Dancers dance.
So, it you lyp-sync, you are a lyp-syncer.

 

If you are what you read,
then who are you if you can’t or don’t read?

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The Familiar Stranger

It was a very common morning. Anonym woke up at 07.15, gathered some spirit before he could actually get up from the bed and thus really awakened at 07.21. First thing he did was to check on his Blackberry to find if there’s important message sent to him. And after that he went downstair and prepared to take his breakfast, but because that day he had none, he took a glass of oatmeals instead.

The next routine was to take a bath. It was his therapy and therefore always took more time than any other activities he does every weekdays. When it was done, he then went out to work, on foot. It took him approximately 5 minutes to reach the spot where he needed to wait for Bemo (a public transportation originated from India, can bring 8 people, three-wheeled and very shaky). Fortunately, that day he needed not to wait too long, before it consumed 5 minutes, the bemo had arrived sound and safe.

Anonym took his step and entered that ‘everyday’ carrier, yeah, very ‘routine’. Like usual, anonym had his mind flying everywhere all the way to his office. But on that day, an almost fallen tree chucked out his mind-journey—–well, that, or what’s the Bemo driver spoke in that scene.

“Scary how a tree could fall down like that, isn’t it?” asked the driver.

“Yeah, it is,” replied anonym.

It was truly near to the end destination of the bemo (before he took another public transportation named Transjakarta) before the driver asked another question.

“So, how is it? Have you got yourself a job already?” The driver probably didn’t know, but that question deeply moved anonym who in that instant also realized that several months ago, it was the same driver who drove him to his job interview before he got the job he was having now.

“Yes, I have.”

“Oh, that’s great!”

“Not really, what’s great is the fact that you by any chance still able to remember me.”

“That’s not something big, i remember all my passengers. And you’re one of them.”

“That’s just…” anonym couldn’t find the right words to express his excitement when he realized more that the shirt he was wearing was the same as what he wore on that day he had his interview.

“I remember everyone, i remember everyone,” he said again, repetitive. Anonym could see his wrinkled face formed a smile. He is friendly and such a nice man, thought anonymous, and he is only become a Bemo driver? That’s so unfair.

Okay, please stop here.” Anonym knew he had arrived to where he needed to take another ride.

“Yes, thank you,” the driver spoke while taking the money anonym gave him.

“See you again,” said anonym tried to be as warm as possible. And separation must occur.

Then, after that, anonym continued his ‘routine’-which on that day felt more different because of the encounter with the driver. All along the way, the thoughts about the driver couldn’t go away from anonym’s mind. All the ‘how could’, ‘why’, ‘what if’, and stuffs played in that small area in his brain. He remembered how he had just had a quarrel with his brother last night over a stupid problem, about how he regreted over the job he choose, about when the last time he had a conversation with a driver, about why God isn’t fair and let nice people on a lower position and rude people to become bosses, about how irrelevant all of his thoughts and the meeting with the driver was. Yeah, all of them. Even, writing it felt so complicated.

But, though it’s weird, it’s true. And even it seemed trivia, on the other side felt so important.

How many percent of chance you can coincidentally meet someone on your way to work, and he is actually the driver of your public transportation, and you are sitting in the front beside him, you found out that he was the same driver you met several months ago on your way to a job interview, you were wearing the same shirt, he remembered you, and after the work is finished, you went home, took another ride, and you meet the same person and feel connected to him?

Coincidental, or, God is trying to tell you something?

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